Ok long story short,
Below is her letter to me the following day:
Since your mutual questioning of faith seems to be creating a frienship between my husband and yourself, I think it's best to make my feelings totally clear. I can't expect you to know that my husbands loss of faith has been extremely painful for me, but I'm letting you know now that it has been and is something I'm extraordinarily sensitive to. I believe that he has expressed to you previoulsy that our differences in ideology have been a challenge for us, as well as I have expressed to Lea that I can't say "I liked" you reaching out to him to discuss your disaffection with the Gospel in the first place, so at the same time, it shouldn't be a surprise to know it makes me feel very uncomfortable. It would be totally unreasonable for me to dictate who my husband associates with and what he discusses, and I won't do that. However, I felt that it was inconsiderate and disrespectful for the two of you to discuss this in my home, while I'm here and, being no dummy, know exactly what's being discussed. It made me feel uneasy in my own home and that upset me.
I once was a visiting teacher to a woman who's husband had ill feelings towards the church. He was often home when I made my visits. While I always made sure to visit her, I NEVER gave a gospel discussion while he was around because I wanted to be respectful of his comfort level and be considerate of his feelings, especially since I was a guest in his home. To bring up a gospel discussion would have been rude and unkind and would have likely caused an argument between this sister and her husband. Please give me the same consideration and sensitivity.
I understand that the majority of responsibility lies with my husband to know my boundries and be respectful to what I'm comfortable with and I have already discussed with him my hurt feelings. But since he indicated that you were the one to bring up the topic and that he wasn't aware beforehand that you would do so, I thought it would be helpful to you to also be clear as to what my boundries are.
I appreciate that you and Lea invited us into your home and were very gracious to us during our visit. I don't intend to harbor negative feelings towards you. I realize that you may think I'm overreacting a bit, and that may be the case, but if I am it's because the pain of my situation is so deep that my reactions are in accordance to my affliction.
I don’t know how often you get on here so I’m sending this message to Lea also to ensure that you receive it, and it’s probably not a bad idea that she understand my position as well.
Thank you, Tasha