Mixed Faith Marriage Support


Mixed Faith Marriage Support

This group is primarily for those navigating a mixed exmo/TBM relationship or marriage to support each other and share what works, what to avoid, and how to best cope or move on. Nevermo/TBM sojourners are also welcome.

Location: support
Members: 67
Latest Activity: Mar 31

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Discussion Forum

TBM wife, not yet outed exmo

Started by Mithryn. Last reply by Elohim's Dad Feb 28. 11 Replies

So what can I say; I'm timid at posting, worried about public opinion, and my wife is very upset about my stance, but not so upset as to try and look in to see if anything I say has credence. I don't…Continue

Women Married to TBM

Started by suzyq. Last reply by MikeUtah Feb 27. 9 Replies

Living with a "worthy priesthood" holder and TBM kids is tough. I haven't officially resigned. But I haven't believed for over 8 years. Looking for other women who can relate. Feels hopeless.

As a Nevermo, I am never going to be good enough

Started by Heatherlovesboo. Last reply by Heatherlovesboo Feb 24, 2012. 5 Replies

I am a nevermo and my husband has been inactive the entire time that we have been together but his family is a multiple generations TBM family. Even though my husband is inactive, I feel like he…Continue

Tags: inactive, TBM, Nevermo

Acceptance, the Key to Being at Peace with Reality

Started by MikeUtah. Last reply by Dan Jan 6, 2012. 2 Replies

(Reposting this blog here as I think it may be useful to those navigating a mixed faith marriage)Acceptance, the Key to Being at Peace with Realityby Micah…Continue

Tags: faith, marriage, mixed, hardships, peace

Comment Wall


You need to be a member of Mixed Faith Marriage Support to add comments!

Comment by JustBreatheN on July 25, 2012 at 10:20am
Good point Dugger. I actually served my mission in the Texas Houston East Mission and served in that area you speak of. The stake president was an anti Mormon and all the anti ended up converting him. He may have been released since I was there but his presence is still lingers. That area has many baptisms because of how he deals with the affairs of the members. It wouldn't surprise me if he actually affected your cousin and his marriage. That area is nuts. Great people in the area, but the leadership is nuts.
Comment by Dugger on July 25, 2012 at 10:08am

I dunno if moving to Texas will guarantee to be the panacea you hope it will.  Sure, it might work out fine for you but my questioning "less active" cousin and his wife moved from UT to South Texas, (Beaumont area), and found there was a pocket of the community densely populated with Taliban TBMs.  His wife was pounced upon by these people and it ended up prying them apart.  They've been divorced for 7 years.  He came back to UT and after remarrying in TX, she and her new hubby are now living in Vernal to be near that particular temple.  Getting a sealing cancellation turned into a real circus story for the family.

Comment by JustBreatheN on July 24, 2012 at 8:09pm
I think I've seen you post on exmormon website before SuzyQ. You've been going that long? What makes your husband so TBM? Why doesn't he see the "dark side" yet? I know what you mean with the whole "feeling the spirit" thing and becoming humble to go back. It's more difficult than that. Unfortunately we will not do that because you can't with the "further light and knowledge" we have. I don't think you or I should give up on the TBM spouse. Do you still love your DH? Does he resent you for being an exmo? I'm interested now. :)
Comment by suzyq on July 24, 2012 at 6:34pm

I would love to help you in anyway I can. I have been trying to not suffocate in my marriage to an ultra TBM man. I'm not on LAM much these days. I am pretty cynical about marriage longevity with postmos and TBM's. There is no acceptance, just hope and prayer and faith that I will be humbled enough to feel the spirit once again. It's more than a set of beliefs, it is also a way of life and a culture here in Utah. I've been fighting this for almost 9 years. I'm worn down and tired of being the bad guy. 

Message me if you want to talk. :) 

Comment by JustBreatheN on July 23, 2012 at 9:21pm
I'll keep you posted.
Comment by JustBreatheN on July 23, 2012 at 9:21pm
Thanks y'all! It's good to hear support. Looking forward to getting a job in Texas. It'll be great. Or at least one step closer to not living on pins and needles. :)
Comment by MikeUtah on July 23, 2012 at 9:17am

Welcome JustBreatheN.  Sounds like you're still in the thick of repercussions of leaving Mormonism.  Getting your wife away from family/TBMs might help, but it might also do the opposite and dig in harder.  For me, I had to realize that my path is my own and my wife has her own path to follow as well.  While she ended up joining me in leaving the church on her own terms, I had to let her discover that for herself, offering sources when asked and such, but otherwise being at peace with whatever she decided, even if that was to stay.  Not sure if that will help but may give you some further points to think about.  Good luck!  We're here when you need a listening and empathetic ear.

Comment by Heatherlovesboo on July 23, 2012 at 8:01am
But my issues are like yours in that the outside pressures from my TBM in-laws seem to be at the heart of most (not all) of my marital problems.
Comment by Heatherlovesboo on July 23, 2012 at 7:59am
The first thing is I dont think you can't predict the end of your marriage. Trying to do that might be like a self fulfilling prophecy. How old are your kids? I like the idea of moving to Texas. I think distance from anyone that is not supportive of your marriage or of you, has to be a good thing. I'm not sure I'm the best person here to give advice. My situation is very different. My husband was inactive when we met and I'm a nevermo. My husband being inactive was less about not believing the teachings but just not believing that he needed to live his life by such stringent principles. It's a much longer story but hopefully someone else will chime in with more thoughts.

I've also gained a lot of help from the Exmormons group on yahoo. There is an active support system there for too.
Comment by JustBreatheN on July 23, 2012 at 2:37am
Excuse my typos if any, I'm typing from my phone. :)

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