Oscar Wilde : Chastity is the greatest form of perversion
LOVE THAT!! in heated debates with TBM's concerning being homosexual in the church it is said that as long as they don't ACT ON IT being gay is a-ok. That is horific to me, even as a hetero- female, to think that these people are telling someone else they can never have that intimate contact or relationship for a LIFETIME, live a celibate life and you will be rewarded in heaven. wow. The same people saying this are also married and getting it on on a regular basis. Yet they can tell others it is "easy" and you "dont need it" so just live a celibate chaste life and it's all good. *gag*
What are your thoughts, is it realistic to expect anyone to live a life of celibacy? I am single, should I guard my chastity with my life? I know in pretty much every major religion fornication is a sin. Homosexuality is a sin. I am not so sure I am convinced of those "facts"... perhaps I am too liberal??
I think it's interesting that it's only talked about in terms of celibacy. It is MUCH more than celibacy. It is a life without the companionship, intimacy, connection, affection from a romantic partner. The Church leaders want to make a loving sexual relationship all about the SEX, and less about the LOVE, if it doesn't fit their bill. And, y'know, let me just say that if someone boils my loving relationship down to satisfying a need for sexual gratification, that does not make ME a pervert. Humans are not meant to live like that, and it can crush someone's spirit to live like that. Members say "We only ask our gay members to do what we ask our unmarried straight members", but their celibate, unmarried straight members can still have attractions towards others, they can still tell someone they love them, they can go on dates, they can get butterflies, they can flirt, they can share that first kiss, than can hold a romantic interest's hand, they can hold or hug a romantic interest, they can cuddle with a romantic interest, they can profess their love for that romantic interest to the world, they don't have to watch to not "offend" someone who happens to be around them and their romantic interest, and THEY DON'T HAVE TO FEEL GUILTY FOR ANY OF THOSE THINGS.
I think that in order for something to be wrong, there has to be evidence that it causes legitimate pain to others, without an additional legitimate benefit. There is a legitimate benefit to living with the people you love, while loving yourself for who you are. There is not legitimate (legitimate meaning that the pain is based on direct harm) pain in "I don't want to see it around me" or "I don't think you should live like that." The second is caused by the homophobia around us, not by that person being gay.
RedLotus, I agree with you completely. If I'm wrong and there is a god, and he wants homosexual people to live their life carrying the heavy cross that is celibacy, that's a pretty severe and unjust punishment. I want nothing to do with such a god. And if you're single and celibate, you're missing out. I'm not saying that you should give it away freely, but life's rough enough. A good orgasm now and then sure does make it better. Sorry if my tone here seems crass, it's not what I was going for, but I think we need to get over this irrational need to suppress sex and sexuality. When done properly, between consenting adults, it adds spice to life, and if we're letting old traditions and stupid dogma keep it out of our lives, then we're doing ourselves a great disservice.
No, you are not! I applaud you for raising the subject. Maybe, I've been there myself as well. Not sure about discussing it too much on a public forum, but if it is a crime, then I've been guilty!
Be interested to go a little deeper into the topic, if you wish.