We're born once, I've told my wife before, but the number of times we come alive after that birth is truly remarkable.
Because of technology that exists in today's civilization, I count myself incredibly lucky to have been given a heads-up; a window of time I can expect to experience life as 'me.' As little as six months or as many as 5 years depending on how well my body responds to the poison that will be administered to it.
So I've decided to make a sober decision to spend what time remains in life by focusing my energies on coming alive as never before; an encore of sorts. And with that decision, and as much as I've not just appreciated, but been a part of the journey with so many of you in the recent past couple of years, I want to leave you with my best wishes. I want to thank you all for being the beautiful and brilliant smiles and eyes behind the computers and devices from which you type your words of solace, humor, understanding, and friendship. You are certainly soft places on the rough patches of the journey.
Mormonism has and always will be a part of me. What a journey it has been.
The irony, is that I honestly attempted to end the journey a couple of years ago. I simply couldn't do it anymore. I had lost everything. And then, by some sweet reprieve, I started getting some of it back. The journey from there to here has been one of tremendous highs and lows, particularly in having to break the news to my precious wife that Mormonism wasn't what it claimed to be. We've both since left the organization and have been learning to build new strategies for how to live life -- like animals born into captivity, Mormonism in this case, we've been set free into the wild to live life and come alive as never before. To love and learn and experience life in ways we could never have imagined.
As with the Mormon truth, I'm at a loss of how to break this sudden biological truth concerning my life to my wife. I intend to wait until after the holidays are over to break the news to her.
For the rest of you folks, I suppose I'm announcing my retirement from the discussion of Mormonism to embark on this new journey and come alive in new and fascinating ways.
I won't say I'll never rejoin the discussion, but it's very likely that I won't. Just like I'll never forget so many of you who indulged and entertained my rantings and thoughts during an interesting part of my personal journey.
I'm so sorry, Sham. Good luck.
Sham! Sounds like quite a journey ahead of you. You will be missed but you need to focus on what life you have left to explore. I don't know what you have, but I would suggest not dismissing alternative therapies and natural approaches. Good luck!
Hi - I've followed many of your posts and can only wish you well on this new "season" you are experiencing.
May you have all the strength and support you need.
Will miss seeing your name, opinions and replies.
From my heart to yours x
It is not a journey, it is your life. It is not a fairy tail that everyone "gushes emotion" over, it is your life as measured in a limited number of days. It is not the train ride, it is the sudden stop at the end. You do not have an infinite number of days left. There is a point certain that you will cease to exist. You have to live now as if there is no tommorrrow. At some point, there isn't. I almost feel as if you want people to rush to you and tell you that we love you, cry, weep, wail and mourn. I am sure you are a very nice person, but I take a German style organised and disciplined approach to most things. Well, except for dogs and showers. :Find something that is not as temporary as your preoccupation with it, and joyfully move forward. See a long and arduous tast through to completion.
Find out what you are about. Then stop with the drama and focus on something that makes you happy, benefits others and is productive. Mormonism is not some thing that you can grow romantic over, feel pain over, run back to, feel hurtand run away from, then gush emotional and ....... It is draino. It will eat everything out of your pipes and leave your brain, heart and soul empty. It is the self serving Borg, and it will consume your life as it has so many others, then look at you as if you did something wrong.
You are a great person. Do something constructive that will bring you joy. Then do it over and over again a thousand times.