I was a convert. I'm now leaving the church. I never got married in the temple and I am very glad I didn't. My question is...why are Mormons so freaking preoccupied with marriage? Why do they think it's logical to tell teenage girls to get married straight out of high school and start having children right away, even if they are still in college? WHERE IS THEIR COMMON SENSE?! I have never met a group of people who are more rabidly obsessed with marriage and having babies than Mormons. Why?!
Thanks so much for the replies everyone. I really need to get out of this cult. I have a friend of mine who just got back from a mission two months ago, met a girl 3 weeks ago, and is now dating/planning to marry her. She is 18 and straight out of high school. They've been together for one week. It is so totally bizarre. I'm afraid this girl will get her heart ripped in half because he is *quite* immature...he has a problem with compulsive lying and is notorious for cheating on his girlfriends. But no. The church says get married as soon as you possibly can. Don't think. Just do it. What kind of wholesome religious organization does that? A cult! How could anyone stay in an organization that promotes such nonsensical behavior? I don't know what I was thinking when I became a member of this crazy and controlling religion...
At least you can see the other side. Those of us born into it weren't so lucky and it was like learning to breath and walk again trying to tear ourselves from that cult.
You will be ok, obviously you can think for yourself and that is the first step!!
I got married in the temple at age 17. I didn't think I ever wanted or needed an education. I had 5 kids by the time I was 27. It was finally then that I realized that I wanted/needed an education. I went to college to get a teaching degree. While going to college, I also attended institute. I remember the teacher telling me I had no business going to college when I had kids to raise. I should be home being a mommy. Luckily, I didn't listen to him.
Humm...well, times are changing, even for Mormons. Yes it is true that Mormon culture AND Mormon teaching/preaching from the earliest times until about the late 1980s promoted the young and dumb to marry, now the message is slightly changing. The DO encourage education, BUT they still promote marriage. Mormon young people are getting married older. My oldest daughter (26) got married at 24 after finishing a Master's degree (sum-cum-whatever) in Accounting. I've drilled into my kids heads that they should get a degree (a USEFUL degree) and then at least a Master's and THEN think about marriage. I told them that all good things are possible, and it helps to achieve those good things in the RIGHT order. I told them to forget about the pressure to marry early, and then I related my horrid experience of getting married early and then scrapping by to finish college (engineering degree) and getting a Master's 10 YEARS later. My wife never finished college, and I did try after the fact to get her to go back, several times.
My enduring memories of my early married life were of great sacrifice, depravation, and poverty. I had no family inheritance or help. I am the definition of the self made man. I wish life memories could be happier. They could have been if I had been given a chance to think for myself. But I was born into a cult and it was very, very, difficult to extricate myself from that thinking.
The reason I think the church pushes marriage is as soon as you commit to that life style the easier it is to control your choices.Being raised in the church you are conditioned constantly to fall into the trance of obedience.you never get a chance to be inspired to find out who you are.Common sense is not something we all are born with,religion makes no sense.The other fact is if you dont get married in the temple,pay a full extorsion tithe,and play by all the rules then you wont go to the celestial kingdom no matter if you are a good person or not.So I guess the question is do we really want to play these religious games or create heaven here on earth while we are here?