By Micah

LDS Church: Do as I say, not as I do

When it comes to evaluating or scrutinizing the LDS church, most members will tell you that the doctrine or church is perfect, but run by imperfect people. While this may sound good in theory to the members, it should be a blaring red flag. This is actually a “stop think” method utilized to keep members from thinking critically about the organization and blaming themselves for it’s (the organization’s) shortcomings. To continue this discussion, I would like to distinguish and segregate LDS faithful into two groups. The first group is comprised of the average member, serving in their local vicinity in various capacities and generally trying to do their best to fulfill what has been asked of them and what they believe is right. The second group is what I would call “upper management”, those at the top of the pyramid dictating the direction of the church whole. This group includes the First Presidency, the Quorum of the 12 Apostles, Seventy and some of the many office positions that keep the church running.

This second group is where I would like to focus and apply my theme of “Do as I say, not as I do”. Though there are literally hundreds, if not thousands of examples of this, today I will play nice and only focus on one, which in a way, covers most of the rest. To setup this example, let’s establish from the LDS Church’s own Gospel Essentials what it means to be honest:

Lying is intentionally deceiving others. Bearing false witness is one form of lying. The Lord gave this commandment to the children of Israel: "Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor" (Exodus 20:16). Jesus also taught this when he was on earth (see Matthew 19:18). There are many other forms of lying. When we speak untruths, we are guilty of lying. We can also intentionally deceive others by a gesture or a look, by silence, or by telling only part of the truth. Whenever we lead people in any way to believe something that is not true, we are not being honest.

While I was on my way out of the church in June of 2008, I met twice with my Stake President. In trying to understand my reasons for leaving, he asked me several questions. “Have you been offended?” No. “Do you have any unresolved transgressions or sins?” No. (Side note: These are the typical off hand reasons that LDS members think of when hearing about a member going inactive or falling away. While this is sometimes the case, it is usually not the norm for stalwart members who leave unexpectedly.) “What is your main concern regarding the church?” My response to this question was the lying and deception to cover up and withhold the full history of Mormon origins.

How do I know the church is covering up or withholding the full story? Because Apostles themselves have admitted and admonished to not teach the full version of church history. Their reasoning is the whole “milk before meat” mentality. However, the diet of church history is never transitioned to “meat” and members are forever left to subside on “milk”. Church educators for seminary and institute often take it upon themselves to learn the “meat” of church history but when they attempt to share this “meat” with eager students, they are sometimes disciplined, threatened, or even fired. So while the “upper management” of the church preaches “honesty”, they themselves are failing to be honest themselves under their own definition of the term: “We can also intentionally deceive others by a gesture or a look, by silence, or by telling only part of the truth”. Essentially what is taught in seminary, institute, primary, and Sunday school doctrine classes around the globe is a severely biased, watered down, and even modified version of the real events.

“It is . . . my conviction that God desires everyone to enjoy freedom of inquiry and expression without fear, obstruction or intimidation. I find it one of the fundamental ironies of modern Mormonism that the General Authorities, who praise free agency, also do their best to limit free agency's prerequisites--access to information, uninhibited inquiry and freedom of expression.”
-Michael Quinn, ex-LDS Historian

The following quotes are excerpts from a discourse given by Elder Boyd K. Packer of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles in 1981 to LDS church educators during a conference at Brigham Young University. This clearly depicts the lengths and means the “upper management” is willing to enforce to keep the LDS faithful on a steady diet of “milk” while withholding the more filling and needed “meat”. (source: "The Mantle is Far, Far Greater than the Intellect", Boyd K. Packer PDF)

"Church history can be so interesting and so inspiring as to be a powerful tool indeed for building faith. If not properly written or properly taught, it may be a faith destroyer."

“There is a temptation for the writer or the teacher of Church history to want to tell everything, whether it is worthy or faith promoting or not. Some things that are true are not very useful."

"The writer or teacher who has an exaggerated loyalty to the theory that everything must be told is laying a foundation for his own judgment. The Lord made it clear that some things are to be taught selectively and some things are to be given only to those who are worthy or trust.”

"That historian or scholar who delights in pointing out the weaknesses and frailties of present or past leaders destroys faith. A destroyer of faith - particularly one within the Church, and more particularly one who is employed specifically to build faith - places himself in great spiritual jeopardy. He is serving the wrong master, and unless he repents, he will not be among the faithful in the eternities. Do not spread disease germs!" (Boyd K. Packer, 1981, BYU Studies, Vol. 21, No. 3, pp. 259-271, emphasis mine)

While I understand the LDS church’s concerns and reasons to build faith instead of “destroying” it, my question is, if the full version of history and events is such that faith would likely not be established when taught, then perhaps it’s not a foundation one would want to have faith in anyways. Notice that Elder Packer’s concerns are not whether truth is being taught, but whether faith is being established. Using this logic, one could freely modify and teach the history of events of any cause to recruit followers, gain power, wealth or whatever and feel that the ends justify the means. However in the LDS church’s case, this is in clear contradiction to their own values and creed.

“As soon as men decide that all means are permitted to fight an evil, then their good becomes indistinguishable from the evil they set out to destroy.” -- Christopher Dawson

When history is modified such that it only paints a positive light for any organization, it is easier for people to get warm fuzzies about it, such that they falsely think they are joining a good cause and fail to recognize or accept all of the skeletons in the closet from both the past and present. They only see and accept what the organization want them to. Unfortunately, when combining this control of information with other subtle means and tactics, the free agency and authentic identity of individuals is literally robbed from them.

“For faith, as well intentioned as it may be, must be built on facts, not fiction - faith in fiction is a damnable false hope.” -- Thomas Edison

Teaching a biased, watered down version of history is, in a very real sense, teaching fiction, spun to the benefit of the organization at the expense of the individual. Deception, lies, and cover-up are normally attributes of evil. An organization that preaches one thing but does another is not an organization worthy of loyalty.

“The prophet himself stands under the judgment which he preaches. If he does not know that, he is a false prophet.” -- Reinhold Niebuhr

“Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.” -- Aldous Huxley

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I am 53 and was born and raised in a very active LDS home. I was married in the temple and believed everything up until several years ago when I started questioning so many things about the church's doctrine, history and present day revelation.  I saw what the church was doing with funds and just could not believe that this was Christ's church.  Long story short I started to research and the rabbit hole kept getting deeper and deeper. All of my siblings are active in the church we have not told them yet.  We have 4 sons that are pretty much on the same page as us.  Our daughter was married in the temple to a returned missionary.  Surprisingly they are very supportive of our decision

I live in Utah and have just recently left the LDS Church.  I want to tell if you leave you will have some spiritual war fare but hang in there darling - the best is yet to come.

God bless

Cali, you wanna know what I felt when I shook it all off? Pure, unadulterated joy! I did move away from AZ to Colorado where I grew up so I do have some family and old friends here. My sons were disillusioned long ago, especially since the youngest is gay. My parents are gone so no agony there, I did leave a covenant marriage about 8 years ago so..Freedom! It was exhilarating!

Remember It is not YOU who is responsible for broken hearts, the liars are. Don't take their crap on you, don't allow that. I just think of them as sadly delusional and know they will get over it - but you! you've got a life to live in which all things are possible.

I did not blame God for the actions of a lazy, greedy con artist who had a real predatory sex problem. A lot of exmos are atheists but I couldn't see how God was responsible for Joe's absolute evil, cunning crap. You will find a way - and the joy you will one day feel! You get to do whatever you dream of now! Don't let anybody spoil this time for you. If you feel like moving and can, find a way. It feels sooo good, so filled with possibilities you never had before.


I live in Utah and left the church a little over two years ago.  I was a 4th generation LDS member for over 53 years.  Married in the temple etc... My husband and I studied church history deeply and found out the truth and could not accept all the deceit and lies from the Church Corporation. If a church has to put up a front and lie it is not of God.  We had to take the man out of our religion and keep only with the source, Jesus Christ, grace and mercy.  I cannot express to you how leaving the LDS church has changed my life for the better.  Yes, for the first year it was so very difficult I would not want to go through it again but sooo worth it.  The relationship I have with my Savior is more than it could have ever been in the LDS church.  It is a very scary thing to leave believing that you are going to lose everything family, holy ghost, eternity, glory etc.  These are also lies I have the Holy Spirit with me just as if not more strong than before. I feel everyday that God holds me in his hand because he POURS out the blessings upon my head and I don't have to do WORKS to be worthy of those blessings. He loves me and wants me to be happy, it is so different on this side. There are so many good resources and blogs that can help give you strength to do this.  Truth is so much better and feels free!!! I have lost several of my siblings but not my children.  4 of our 5 children have also left (married with children) my daughter is still very much an active LDS member but she has a sweet heart and is very accepting and non judgemental of us, she just loves us.   I hope one day she will also leave.  There is so much more I could tell you but I do not want to be to long winded.  If I can help you with any help or support, please e-mail me at I know it can be a very scary journey on your own.

I can relate to the talk in 1981 since I was full time CES then.  I recall how excited and nervous most of us were (I taught in the Pacific Northwest) wondering if we had offended the Lord by already sharing too much.  No worries though.  Most of us had never ventured far enough into the history an literature to learn enough to spread dangerous "disease germs" (the truth).

I recall that this talk was quoted at nearly every meeting we held, to make sure that we kept ourselves sufficiently ignorant - WTF?  I recall that my colleagues took great pride in testifying that they would not read anything outside the approved curriculum, and that they only used the scriptures when teaching.  (No wonder these guys could bore kids to death without really trying).

Thank goodness for the internet!  Now interested Mormons can get great information online easily and can learn the truth for themselves.

I used to tell students and colleagues in CES, afraid to venture on to the internet in the 90's for fear of being lied to and sucked into the apostate's abyss.  Critics of Mormonism don't lie.  They don't have to.  They can quote straight out of the members' diaries, journals, meeting notes, etc. and have everything they need to cause members to question.

Thanks for the comment Ken!  I enjoyed hearing your story of being in CES at the time of your exit when you presented at the exmo conference in 2008.  I've had many debates with TBMs on Facebook over this talk and there appears to be no end to how they will bend their interpretation and accuse me of quoting out of context.  The context of the whole talk is deplorable.  They just don't want to see it for what it is.

I said this about Joseph to a very LDS friend, her reply he married them after they died. What ? And that makes it right. Hummm

This is music to my ears.  Thanks for putting my thoughts on paper so eloquently Mike!

 You're welcome.

I wish I could take you with me to a family dinner! Oh the conversation!!!! 4 brothers, returned Missionaries, on a seminary Teacher, Brother inLaw on the High Council, 2 Sisters married to return Missionaries, my Dad was a High Priest as well (He passed away). The "CHURCH" IS the ANSWER to everything in my family's eyes. Difficult, and lonely position for me at times. Thank you for the post!

Hang in there girl! Stay strong and true to yourself. Time will increase your strength and you will be fine as you get more comfortable in your freedom!


Rarely do I read a post in any group of any purpose that is as relevant, accurate and on proper course as this one.  Great job and thanks for sharing your personal experiences in this process.  


Thank you Don, and you're welcome!  


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