I stopped believing in smoke and steam. No one is more powerful in my life than I am. I am the one that makes my decisions. If, for some reason, I am not happy with where I am, then make and implement a better decision. I stopped having anything but disdain for the LDS leadership that will knowingly lead people off a cliff for their own aggrandizement and sometimes I think entertainment. They became more like the Nazis in my mind when they were going to cut of an entire section of society and actively were going to work for it with the Prop 8 in CA. They got found out tho and are just now beginning to get the world embarrassment they deserve.
I stopped worrying at all and began thinking more. If I am not a tool, stop being a "tool" :) i stopped believing in a lot of silliness and began to enjoy more the things that are important. It is more important that I sit out on my patio, enjoy the shade and some iced tea with a tuna salad sandwich than to listen to the self serving cow fertilizer that emanates from the Church Office Building.
I stopped believing in the BOM having even so much as literary value, which places it under Aesops Fables and Grimms Fairy Tales. Its a fake.
Don ...reclaiming my life, a day at a time...and it is so freakin fantastic!! :)
Yeah, that's an interesting point. I remember even as a missionary thinking that if it isn't mormonism, then nothing is true. But to actually accept that, it has taken time. As I see it, "Belief" is a process as a person moves along the spectrum of thought and understanding.
If a god does in fact exist, he/she seems to having nothing to do with the inhabitants of this planet, in which case I would ask, why should that god exist?
2010 was my official I'm out mentally...but I'd had some major doubts all the way back to when I first went to the temple (2001)...then the mission...and so on. But the big cog dis came when I became pregnant with my son and began to ponder about raising him Mormon and that's when it all came crashing down, and that was in 2008.
It's difficult to say. I began to disbelieve before I was baptised, because I was coming to the church 2nd time around, and when I stopped attending the first time around, I wasn't old enough to have learned much other than the 'milk', and only began to really hear about the 'meat' when I gained access to the internet around 2001-2003. At that time I joined a pro-LDS message board, began reading arguments for and against the church/real history etc. and made my mind up it was a fraud sometime prior to being baptised in 2008. I was baptised more or less so that I could get further inside the church than I could as an investigator..to see if I found anything else out that was discomforting. Unfortunately, to get that far, you have to be a fully paid up (tithing), fully obeying member who's allowed to take out endowments etc. at the temple, and I was sort of outed as a possible disbeliever before I could get that far..and I objected to paying tithing on a regular basis anyway!
For me it was 20 years ago, when I was 16, so 1990. There were many things that told me the church was not true, a fraud. Since then, I've just shoved it to the back of my head and didn't think about it. A few years ago, at the suggestion of a friend I read Jon Krakauer's book, Under the Banner of Heaven. That lead to reading 20-30 more books about the history of the church, both LDS and FLDS. The last book I read, Leaving the Saints; How I lost the Mormons and found my faith, sealed the deal for me. It wasn't until the later part of the book that I actually found out that I could resign. It's been less than 2 weeks, but it's such a relief and an eye opening experience. I want to shout it from the rooftops!