So how many of you have went back and forth with doubts on your faith since leaving? I still question myself sometimes. I have read all the info that I need to know that J.S is a fraud but sometimes I still wonder or sometimes old thinking will come back in even without realizing it. I know it will take time to get over being LDS but I still don't do some things or talk about certain things just in case the church is true in the end. Stupid I know but I guess mind control is something that doesn't go away over night.
I understand how you are feeling. I felt that way for about a year after I left the church. Sometimes I would think, what if it is true? The more I read and gained an understanding of the lies of Mormonism the easier it was for me to continue on my journey out of Mormonism. It is good to remember that there was a lot of brainwashing going on inside the church. Whenever I bore my testimony that the church is true the more it reinforced that belief in my mind. The key for me is expanding my horizons, and learning new and exciting things. Mormonism is very myopic. As a Mormon, I did not allow myself to read and learn about a lot of things outside of the church. I had a narrow vision of life. Now that I am expanding my horizon's and finding my own way of thinking, My mind has been filled up with new ideas, new thought patterns and my mind is drifting away from the narrow minded thought pattern I once called my own. It has been liberating. I have replaced my narrow mindedness with open mindedness and freedom of thought. My life used to be about the destination. now it is about the journey. Best Wishes on your journey!
This is a fairly common thing to go through. I have experienced this and briefly still do. Briefly, as in, it only lasts a few seconds as I quickly reflect on the absurdity of it all. It will get better as the longer and farther out you get. Hang in there. You're not alone.
I am so upset with myself right now. I let my doubts keep me from getting baptized today. All I did was stay home and sleep all day and be depressed. So depressed that I made myself sick throwing up. I am so tired of being lost. Alll I want is my Jesus but something always keeps me from moving on so in turn I really don't know if I am really ready to leave the LDS church or not. So any advice would be great. Thanks
Where were you going to be baptized? Aren't you already LDS? Just move slowly. You don't have to make any decision about anything right now. Take care of yourself first. Address your depression with a professional if necessary. Just focus on living for the moment if possible so as not to be overwhelmed with all of the decisions ahead of you. Take care!
I left the church officially in Aug. I wrote my resignation letter in October but still are not officially out yet. Anyways I found a nice christian church in September. It's an awesome church that deals with the basic's and has alot of great programs. Anyways after reading the New Test. again I really felt the need to get rebaptized so I asked the one pastor right. Well I have had three different dates and I have chicken out every time. So I just don't know why. Everytime I feel good about it and then the day comes and then I always go back to the "What if the LDS church is true" in the end. So I guess I just need more time. As far as the depression well I am on anti depressants and do see a Dr. It was just one of those days where I didn't know what was right and I felt lost so I decided just to keep praying and reading my Bible and see how I feel in a few more weeks. Thanks for all the advice though guys. It's nice to not feel alone. Its been hard losing 3/4 of my friends when I left the LDS church.
My sojoum, FWIW my advice would be NOT to join this "christian" church at all. Some people when they leave the LDS religion take that route (did it myself!) but the reality is that you are doing it all for the wrong reasons. IMHO protestant "born again" xianity is even worse than mormonism, and I have been involved with both. Nobody who leaves the LDS religion to move to another fundamentalist denomination stays there very long. You will soon realise that this "nice christian" church is just another controlling brand of fundamentalism who happen to believe that they have a better imaginary friend than the LDS religion. Sorry to be so blunt, but I am afraid for you and need to warn you of the dangers, in the same way as I would warn anybody about joining the LDS cult. You have taken the first steps towards standing on your own two feet, and do not an imaginary friend to help you.
It's very difficult. I have doubts all of the time. But i dont think they have to do so much with the theology and religion of the mormon church but rather the community. I really miss having that common direction in my life. A clear cut plan. Life without the church can seem chaotic at times, especially when i'm not feeling strong-willed. The church always seemed like a crutch during the hard times. I went looking to other churches as well, to resolve my guilt over leaving and to hopefully find that sense of community. I never found it. Instead I took the leadership skills I obtained in the church and formed my own community. I found a group of people that needed to be connected and we've formed our own little family. We meet weekly and do charity work, games, movies, lots of the same thigns I did in my Youth Women's program. It's helped a lot. I think that what you may be missing is that sense of community. Why dont you try finding one that's no affiliated with religion first and then see where you feel that blank space. Worked for me, it could work for you. Never hurts to try. :) I wish you the best. God bless!