i imagine one day mormonism will be so far behind in my life that i will not care for it anymore, no more spending hours on the bloggernacle, no more searching in google "lds" news to see if there is any strange thng happening to the GAs. No more Glenn Beck, no more Podcast listening, no more back of my mind thinking and comparing "what will the mormon me do in this situation"..........

I need to know if it is possible.

Do you think that former mormons can leave it really behind or is like a disease we carry always with us?

Is it healthy to know we cannot erae it or is possible to "deprogram ourselves"?


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You received some excellent advice here and as I read your words, I could hear your lovely Spanish accent. You sound like you have really taken the loss hard my friend so move on and enjoy your life. There are other exmos in BC if you can find them sometimes it helps. I think having someone who is a real life friend and not only a cyber friend helps even more. You may find some good friends in the exmo community. If you are ready for it, why don't you tell people where you live so that you might have the chance of meeting. The Exmormon Foundation conference - a cheap plug here, is awesome. Once a year, in Salt Lake City in Oct. You hear excellent talks about various topics of interest to former mormons; and those former mormons become your flesh and blood friends. It is about 1000 miles for us to get there for us, but each time I have loved it and the fabulous people I meet each time. I look forward to seeing and hugging with those I have met on previous years, chatted with on forums - it is a whole new community and yet not limiting in any way. We are Atheists, Agnostics, Catholics, Freethinkers, Libertarians any type you want you will find them here and at the conferences; people with the integrity to leave the cult when they discovered the truth instead of trying to make the evidence fit their beliefs.

BE an exmormon my friend; exult in that fact because as an exmormon you can be whoever the hell you want. Buenos Noches.

Jean, you are all candian exmos favourite!!!

thanks for your comments

Henry, had DW had a conversation with the bishop as to how she is to respect you regardless of your position concerning the church?  Doctrinally, that's a good start.
I surmise that Mormon mind control is further behind you than you think. So many people that I observe do not like the hell that comes hand in glove with Mormon life. But, somehow, they chooose to stay around in thought, deed or intent. If you are in a burning house see howlon you take to identify the problem and take corrective behavior!

I knew a guy hat had a puppy. This puppy would poop in the house, all puppies do at first. He was so focused on the problem of puppies pooping, what they eat, where they go, what causes it.... He defined the damned hell out of the problem. But did nt spend a single second on the solution. All he had to do is take the sweet puppy out two or three times a day. The dog developed bad habits and was still pooping in the house...years later. The dog had developed bad habits...? Well, not really. The dog did what dogs do, and it was the humans responsibility to teach and train the dog. Instead the dog did not get trained and the human reinforced bad human skills.

If we stay in and build upon bad habits, it is not the habit, but us. We have unlimited potential. We can dig ditches or be the engineer that plans the ditch. I do not involve any Mrmon mind control, or member mind control in anything I do. Why would I, a person that made it out of prison so to speak, seek the council of a person who was still in the damned prison? You are free. Do not look to anything that you associate with Mormonism to assist you. If you don't like apples stop looking at apple sauce, thinking about apple pie, apple trees... Enjoy your freedom. You are free just because you damned well said you are.

Lincoln freed the slaves down here where i live in the 1860's. Did you know that not all left. Only a few left actually. The rest stayed and became sharecroppers. Do not be a sharecropper in your own life. Be free, be as YOU choose to be, and take a fly swat to the small Mormon thing. it is as big as you "choose" to make it. No drama, only success to you.

meta con acion! Com metas y acion el mundo es tuya!! muevete!! :) Get excited and focus on your great life that you are in right now. Don't focus on the problem, the dog poop. Focus on the future of a happy house pet, the clean and shiney floor. :) You will achieve whatever your mind focuses on and see's!


thanks Dob, time will tell, one thing is for sure, i am out of the prison as you pointed out.

dependancy on the thngs of the past can be corrected, i am sure.

I successfully ignored it for a long time, ironically, while I was still living in Salt Lake.  It was easier to ignore in Salt Lake because I never had to explain anything to anyone.When I moved, the mere mention of my state of origin would bring it all up again. 

This was what motivated me to look up exmormon web sites. It has helped me to make peace with my past, which is important because you really can't get rid of it, it is what made you who you are. 

Maybe others have said this,   take a break from the online community, go snowboarding or go take a tango class, instead of going on line.   We will all still be here--


I can totally relate!  Thats kinda funny how you referred yourself as the "Mormon Me"... I say the same thing when it comes to different things.  "What would the Mormon me do?" lol, Makes me laugh.  IMHO i think we can "deprogram ourselves" from the Mormon thinking to a certain point, at least to a certain point where we dont have a "Mormon Me" version of ourselves inside us still haha.  I'm sure the years you have in the business will determine how long it may take but its gotta be possible. 
is gotta be, i agree
We can look back at our religious history and realize that there was just plain goofiness going on, as other religions have.  Many people from other religions tell similar stories about their parents and families.  Not too many in reformed christian churches, as they tend to look at life a little differently, but there are still plenty of crazies to share our lives and experiences with.  Not naming other religions.  But we all know they are there, so if we have to learn to shed our past, and take any positive experiences with us, then perhaps many others will as well.  I still feel the need to "tend" to others who've been ill or had surgery, or given birth.  Those were good things.  I still feel very comfortable hugging other women who are exhausted and need a break, and I'll take them to a movie.  These things I learned very young as a mormon girl.  Keeping in touch with others just to make sure all is okay.  For me, those are the good things I learned.

Great question! I still get a jar every time I drive past a LDS chapel. There are still emotions ingrained in my mind that pop up at the strangest times. Conversations with truly wonderful and intelligent people who were so in love with the LDS church and the doctrine. They felt special, blessed and on the narrow path.


When I left over race (ugly doctrine about Blacks), gays (Prop H8), polygamy (Joseph's 14 and 15 year old wife) women's issues (Women in the church are still in the best position in the world), attitudes of the superior white LDS male (I won't listen but let me straighten you out)

I went out of my way to follow the church through blogs, chat rooms etc just to convince myself that I had been right in my very difficult decision. I grabbed onto anything negative about the Church or the GAs. So do not feel alone. I went through counseling and anti-depression med before I finally stomped my foot and said, "NO! I am right. I just have to follow my path and not worry about something that was slowly killing me."


I think that one of the problems was that I was not perfect while I was in the church and therefore doubted the indicators because it might be an "excuse to doubt" (you learn that early in the church). I was also doubting the faith of my parents (we want the world to do just that but not us). Anyway to shorten this - I am slowly deprograming myself and yes it can be done. I went to a Protestant Church that helped me. I feel better about it all of the time. It is like a divorce, it takes about 3 years before you can look back and see how truly hopeless it really was.






Think about this guys. People that are LDS that dought the Church and get depressed are given medications till they get better. Interesting. and actually funny. The Church's members that are depressed and feel they are loosing touch with reality are given drugs to cause them to not have the questions about the Church, ...and stay in touch with reality! Think about this objectively guys.

God, .....Stalin and Mao would have loved this.

Gotta be careful here about stating people aren't in touch with reality.  I was given anti-depressents for years before we had to add more for the bipolar.  You act like anti-depressents turn out goons or something.  I never stopped being an asshole at church, and I never stopped asking.  And if it's a simple case of depression that can be lifted, three to six months of medication isn't going to do someone in, or, keep them in line.  In fact, they may see things clearer because they have the desire to get out of bed in the morning and function.


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